My husband and I have always wanted a family. We are unfortunately having fertility problems. This is about my journey and feelings along the way. I am using this as a therapeutic method as well as wanting to hear of anything that might have worked for others!
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Small Setback
I talked to Walgreens and although they cover my shots their supplier does not make/sell Gonal. So now I have to go around to different pharmacies to find out who will fill it! I will just have to google it and call them and hopefully find a place that will have it or can order it!! I don't start a new cycle for another week and a half so have plenty of time! Things are looking definitely up! =)
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Yay!
Found out Tricare is going to cover my Gonal shots!!! I am so excited and glad God answered our prayers!! Walgreens has to order them tomorrow and then Iwill find out how much my deductible is, but the most I have ever had to pay for any med is $12 so hopefully that is all!!!
I am still taking Provera for now to start a new cycle. Normally this stuff just made me gain a little weight and break out my face some, but this time I am have serious hot flashes! My students are wondering why I am going crazy! I have the heat on one minute and the air on the next...oh well hopefully it only lasts 3 more days!
I am still taking Provera for now to start a new cycle. Normally this stuff just made me gain a little weight and break out my face some, but this time I am have serious hot flashes! My students are wondering why I am going crazy! I have the heat on one minute and the air on the next...oh well hopefully it only lasts 3 more days!
Monday, February 21, 2011
Good News
I found out from a friend from high school that Tricare Prime will cover quite a bit of fertility procedures. I haven't heard anything yet about the Gonal F shots. The insurance is still making a decision. No news is good news I have always heard....But it is VERY hopeful that our insurance is above and beyond more amazing than we already knew. We should find out before the end of the week unless they need to talk to my dr some more. At least that is what I think happens.
Side note: We had a fire at school today!! One of the 1st grade students brought in a lighter and lit his papers in his desk on fire. Then someone tried to get the desk cleared out into a trash can and put water from the bathroom in it. We were just getting into the room and I didn't even know who was absent when the fire alarm went off. I was kind of annoyed that we were not warned and it was so early. It never crossed my mind that there really was a fire! We have correctly done fire drills soooo many times, but of course on the day that there really is a fire the kids go completely the wrong way to get out of the school. We even had to turn around and go the right way. By this time I smelled the smoke and told them to go back the way they came and get out of the building. On our way down yet another flight of stairs the kids start smelling it. It was barely there but they started coughing and gagging....then complained that thier lungs hurt....until I told them there was hardly any trace of smoke they are fine!! Then I got giggles of course.
You can just imagine how impossible it was to get them back on track!! Snow days are nothing compared to fire days! haha!
Side note: We had a fire at school today!! One of the 1st grade students brought in a lighter and lit his papers in his desk on fire. Then someone tried to get the desk cleared out into a trash can and put water from the bathroom in it. We were just getting into the room and I didn't even know who was absent when the fire alarm went off. I was kind of annoyed that we were not warned and it was so early. It never crossed my mind that there really was a fire! We have correctly done fire drills soooo many times, but of course on the day that there really is a fire the kids go completely the wrong way to get out of the school. We even had to turn around and go the right way. By this time I smelled the smoke and told them to go back the way they came and get out of the building. On our way down yet another flight of stairs the kids start smelling it. It was barely there but they started coughing and gagging....then complained that thier lungs hurt....until I told them there was hardly any trace of smoke they are fine!! Then I got giggles of course.
You can just imagine how impossible it was to get them back on track!! Snow days are nothing compared to fire days! haha!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
New Strategy
Ok so God and I had a loooong talk while I was in the waiting room for my appt today. I prayed that I wouldn't freak out and cry when I found out the med didn't do what it was supposed to. I then felt a peace come over me and even before the doctor came in I knew it didn't work. And I was ok with it! I know He has a plan and just have to wait to find out what it is...
Ok so Dr. Zwieg told me that the Clomid did absolutely nothing to help the eggs grow. There are lots of them made but none that are big enough. He started me on the pill to start my period (I HATE this med, it is horrible!). Then he told me he would bring in the big artillery now. I will still do rounds of Clomid and Femara but I am adding shots to them ( I honestly cannot remember the name). Buuut here is the bad part....right now insurance has denied covering it. However, they are calling my dr and going to do a meeting to decide if he has covered all his bases and whether or not they will cover it. The shots cost $1700 a piece and I have to take them for 5 days! Yikes!!!! So needless to say insurance has to cover it or we won't be using this method. But at least we have a different plan! He said this is the last thing to do before upping the chances to have multiples...at this point that is ok with me! Esp since I don't know if there would be more and we definitely want more than 1.
So that is the latest craziness!! All I know is that God is the only one keeping me sane! =)
Ok so Dr. Zwieg told me that the Clomid did absolutely nothing to help the eggs grow. There are lots of them made but none that are big enough. He started me on the pill to start my period (I HATE this med, it is horrible!). Then he told me he would bring in the big artillery now. I will still do rounds of Clomid and Femara but I am adding shots to them ( I honestly cannot remember the name). Buuut here is the bad part....right now insurance has denied covering it. However, they are calling my dr and going to do a meeting to decide if he has covered all his bases and whether or not they will cover it. The shots cost $1700 a piece and I have to take them for 5 days! Yikes!!!! So needless to say insurance has to cover it or we won't be using this method. But at least we have a different plan! He said this is the last thing to do before upping the chances to have multiples...at this point that is ok with me! Esp since I don't know if there would be more and we definitely want more than 1.
So that is the latest craziness!! All I know is that God is the only one keeping me sane! =)
Sunday, February 13, 2011
....more Clomid....
Day 4 of Chlomid....only one more day thankfully! My temperature was up starting Friday which is supposed to mean ovulation but with my temp it is always off. It also said my temp was 98.1 on day 9 buuuut no ovulation. I apparently cannot go off of temp like others are able to. Hopefully Tuesday we will find out good news that the eggs have grown to the normal size, at least one of them. I just hope I do not go crazy with this med before then! I cannot even imagine if this doesn't work and he ups the dosage next month! Yikes!! Jacob said he was going to send me to a spa for a week while I am taking it! ha! He has been very understanding but it has been hard on him too I know. Hopefully we won't have to worry about next month! We will find out soon!
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Dr appt
First off we have amazing friends and family that are praying for us!! Thank you for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers!!!! We love yall!!
I had my appt today! It was neither good nor bad I guess. My blood pressure was 144/88 because I was so anxious! He said my uterine lining looks perfect and much better than it has the past months. But my eggs are only 10 mm and they are supposed to be 20 mm. He gave me yet more Clomid to take until Monday. Then he wants to see me again on Tuesday afternoon.
I asked what is next if this does not work. He told me I am reacting better to this than just the Clomid so he will probably up the dosage (I cannot imagine feeling any more crazy!!) and try it another month. After that we can decide to keep on the medicine or move on to the "heavy artillery." I think he said that to make a joke since Jacob was there and is in field artillery for him mos...Anyway, he said that is when it starts getting expensive so he tries to wait as long as possible. Now I just need to contact Tricare to find out how far they go to cover fertility...They have really surprised me so far!
I also asked what was wrong with me??? Why is this medicine not reacting properly?? He said that I have a hormanal imbalance and it is messing with my ovaries growing suitable eggs. He will not start running tests yet because he does not want our insurance to pitch a fit for running "unnecessay" tests just yet. We want them happy with us. I have known my hormones have been messed up for a few years now though so that was no big surprise. My face still breaks more than I would want and the dermitologist finally told me there was nothing he could do when I was in Tx. It is just because of my crazy hormones. =)
So our journey continues!!
I had my appt today! It was neither good nor bad I guess. My blood pressure was 144/88 because I was so anxious! He said my uterine lining looks perfect and much better than it has the past months. But my eggs are only 10 mm and they are supposed to be 20 mm. He gave me yet more Clomid to take until Monday. Then he wants to see me again on Tuesday afternoon.
I asked what is next if this does not work. He told me I am reacting better to this than just the Clomid so he will probably up the dosage (I cannot imagine feeling any more crazy!!) and try it another month. After that we can decide to keep on the medicine or move on to the "heavy artillery." I think he said that to make a joke since Jacob was there and is in field artillery for him mos...Anyway, he said that is when it starts getting expensive so he tries to wait as long as possible. Now I just need to contact Tricare to find out how far they go to cover fertility...They have really surprised me so far!
I also asked what was wrong with me??? Why is this medicine not reacting properly?? He said that I have a hormanal imbalance and it is messing with my ovaries growing suitable eggs. He will not start running tests yet because he does not want our insurance to pitch a fit for running "unnecessay" tests just yet. We want them happy with us. I have known my hormones have been messed up for a few years now though so that was no big surprise. My face still breaks more than I would want and the dermitologist finally told me there was nothing he could do when I was in Tx. It is just because of my crazy hormones. =)
So our journey continues!!
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Some background info for ya!
Ok I have never actually written one of these but know I need to get my feelings and experiences out there. My husband and I have gone through a lot so far in our marriage. One of the main things we are currently presented with is fertility problems. I was diagnosed with endometriosis (where the uterus sheds a lining on the insde and outside) so when I ever have a period I am also "bleeding" inside of me. This causes a lot of scar tissue which in turn can cause fertility problems. I had a laproscope done in December 2008 where they cleaned out all the endometriosis. For a year and a half after that I was put on birth control non-stop so that I would not have a period which would help with the endometriosis. We were told that our best chance to conceive was as soon as he got home from his deployment. We really were not ready and wanted to wait until we were completely ready to start our family. I did not want to be rushed into making that big of a decision.
We finally decided to start our family in July 2010. I was off the pill until I went to see my dr in late October. He told me that I needed to get the process moving so that I would not continue to have problems with the endometriosis. He put me on Clomid that month and monitored me closely. Unfortunately it did not work in November or December. The Clomid just was not working with my body so he decided to add Femara to the Clomid. This is where we are right now. The Femara is CRAZY! I felt like I was going insane and I know my husband was ready for those 5 days to be over almost as ready as I was. I just kept calling my mom complaining on how crazy I felt. How could a person feel that many emotions all at once?? I have heard pregnancy is the same if not worse but at least with that you can be happy. This is more depressing to be honest...There might not be a "happy ending" with taking this med that messes with your every emotion.
So that is my story in a nutshell. It seems that everyone around me gets pregnant so easily! Right now I have 4 people that are close friends or family that are expecting. I am thrilled for them! I really and truly am, but that doesn't stop the hole that is building in my heart. When I first heard about the endometriosis and what it could do to us when starting a family I had a huge fear. I mean, that is kind of a wife's "job." I am supposed to be able to have a baby when we want but the fear is becoming reality. People keep telling me "it will happen when it is time." Well I was told 30 was my time limit by my 1st dr and I am 26. We want more than 1 child and I am scared that that time will not come....
I am trusting and praying that everything will happen and I really believe that God has a plan for us. Iwould not be able to go through this without Him. I just have to stop worrying and keep giving our "plan" up to God so that His plan can happen. The only problem is this has to happen about 10 times a day! =)
I have my dr appt tomorrow hopefully. So I will have more news tomorrow! Wow that was a lot, but this does help and I hope that if someone reads this and is going through something similar it will help them as well!
We finally decided to start our family in July 2010. I was off the pill until I went to see my dr in late October. He told me that I needed to get the process moving so that I would not continue to have problems with the endometriosis. He put me on Clomid that month and monitored me closely. Unfortunately it did not work in November or December. The Clomid just was not working with my body so he decided to add Femara to the Clomid. This is where we are right now. The Femara is CRAZY! I felt like I was going insane and I know my husband was ready for those 5 days to be over almost as ready as I was. I just kept calling my mom complaining on how crazy I felt. How could a person feel that many emotions all at once?? I have heard pregnancy is the same if not worse but at least with that you can be happy. This is more depressing to be honest...There might not be a "happy ending" with taking this med that messes with your every emotion.
So that is my story in a nutshell. It seems that everyone around me gets pregnant so easily! Right now I have 4 people that are close friends or family that are expecting. I am thrilled for them! I really and truly am, but that doesn't stop the hole that is building in my heart. When I first heard about the endometriosis and what it could do to us when starting a family I had a huge fear. I mean, that is kind of a wife's "job." I am supposed to be able to have a baby when we want but the fear is becoming reality. People keep telling me "it will happen when it is time." Well I was told 30 was my time limit by my 1st dr and I am 26. We want more than 1 child and I am scared that that time will not come....
I am trusting and praying that everything will happen and I really believe that God has a plan for us. Iwould not be able to go through this without Him. I just have to stop worrying and keep giving our "plan" up to God so that His plan can happen. The only problem is this has to happen about 10 times a day! =)
I have my dr appt tomorrow hopefully. So I will have more news tomorrow! Wow that was a lot, but this does help and I hope that if someone reads this and is going through something similar it will help them as well!
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